… i sew myself shut. my weakness is that i care too much. my scars remind me that the past is real. i tear my heart open just to feel. – “scars”, papa roach.
its been nearly a year since i started this blog. i was blogging furiously back then thanks to a stupid breakup. raaah. i’d drum out entry after emo entry, in hope of reaching out to another broken-hearted someone and perhaps in return, seek some form of consolation. aaaaaand! i gotta thank you, my readers: i might not know who you are… YOU! hiding behind your avatars and nicks and bogus email addies, but you have been my pillar of strength 
its so funny when i look back now…cuz i REALLY thought back then that i’ll never love again lor! okaaaaay… that was a TAD dramatic. but after the breakup, i became exceedingly cautious and cynical when it came to matters of the heart. but that didnt mean i was depressed or anything. i enjoyed singlehood with the kind of gusto i never thought i had: i travelled alot, met new people, did loadsa fun things like sky dive… i LIVED life. but back in the private confines of my head space, i thought alot about this little thing called “love”. i missed that skip in my step, that warm glow and fuzzy feeling inside.. and that silly ear-to-ear grin that happens whenever i fall hopelessly in love.
at this point i’d like to clarify that when i say “fall in love”, it doesnt have to mean the serious “til death do us part” type of feeling. urgh. way too much pressure, that. ”love” could mean anything from a lil crush to an infatuation… basically any positive feeling that hints towards a heart thats open and accepting
so i met him at a tequila bar one chilly thursday night in LA. i listened to him talk and i liked the things he said. (helps that he’s painfully cute as well.. and has the sexiest set of teeth! yes, im obsessed with teeth…) i left my friends outside for a bit and headed indoors for a drink with him. he said he was going to buenos aires for a holiday in the summer and invited me along. moved a tad too fast for comfort but right at that moment, my heart skipped a beat. and i knew. i cant fool myself, no point being cruel, the world’s tough enough as it is… i like this guy. ALOT. okay so he’s younger than i am. this “relationship” feels forbidden, yet so darn romantic. so after daily exchanges of lengthy emails and the occasional skype sessions, he’s makin a trip down to singapore for a week in december before we be jettin’ off to argentina…. mad love. FOUR MORE MONTHS! can die… serrriously….
so yes. the rozzie heart is open again. nothing concrete. but its defo open, alright. im possibly setting myself up for some sort of defeat somewhere down the road… but heck! ima just sit back, not expect too much and enjoy the ride
RYAN LEE
omg im so excited and happy for you! do let us readers know more about him, like his name age occupation nationality likes dislikes how you hitched off etc! rozz you rock! <3
jazzie pazzazie: read city of angels entry babe
rozz: excellent leap of faith!
Don’t let the past bring you down..
I feel happy for you!
And I want to go Argentina!
someone once told xiaxue the same thing when she announced she was dating mike.. welcome to the world of ldr. may your phone bills explode. :p
all the best babe <3
that’s so awesome! i know it’s nothing official, but congrats rozz. it’s so great to see someone happy; the world could always do w/ one more person who’s (as cliched as it may sound) living life and loving it. (:
hey rozz, glad that you could feel love again and you get it back. just like what you said, just the feeling will do, no ’till death do us part’ thing. I feel that what you experience really relate a lot of us out here. I have the same experience of locking self up and stuff but lately, I could feel ‘love’ again but unfortunately somehow the timing and somehow is like the wrong person and I couldn’t get the ‘love’ back. Could feel the cruel pain again but at least I could feel that I’m ‘alive’
btw, I went to SG last week, wanted to try out 2AM(as you mention it’s a good place) but by the time I went it’s already last call, so didn’t get to try it. Maybe next time.
Awww..that is so romantic and adventurous! Kinda sweet too. I’m sure we’re all very happy to see that you are happy too! Enjoy the wait and the trip too. Most importantly, be safe!
happy for you rozz!
have a great time with him <3
hey ross. just to hear how happy u r feeling, i think all ur fans and readers can agree wif me dat we r all happy for u!
to pull down the defensive walls of the heart takes courage. 
go ross go!
OMG Ross!!!!!
I totally knew it when i read your entry on Vegas.
I am so happy that you have now open your heart again.
It’s ok if one day you realise it does not work out.
As long as you know you have tried your very best to make yourself and the other person happy.
Best of luck ross!
ROZZ! You don’t know me and I don’t personally know you, but I am happy for you! This just warms my heart..
awww! i’d love to meet you some day